I find myself starting these Straight Talk Sunday posts off with this often, and I’ve again got to say that I apologize for not making this “column” a very regular feature. I’m not sure if it’s because I haven’t felt like I’ve had enough time, or maybe it’s more that I haven’t been sitting down and thinking about an introspective piece for a little while. I’m going to go ahead and guess that it’s a mix of both. I got to thinking something today, though, and I think it’s worth sharing with all of you. It started with an e.e. cummings quote that I read today:
To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.
I think that as I’ve been flipping through the chapters of life, moving quickly from one to the next, I’ve forgotten to keep fighting at times. I’ve moved around a lot, met a ton of new people, and sometimes feel a bit like a chameleon, adjusting myself and my character to adapt to the atmosphere around me. Though I like to be able to say that I can fit into many different situations, I don’t ever want to pretend to be something or someone who I am not.
Though I typically am open to do so, today I don’t want to let my thoughts completely run free on the paper, partly because I’m not one hundred percent sure how to express them or what they really are. So instead, I thought I’d write a bit about who I am.
I am a sister.
I am a go-getter.
I am a writer.
I am a talker.
I am working every day on becoming a better listener.
I am a smiler.
I am a lover.
I am happy running.
I am happy sitting.
I am a home-body.
I am happy in your company.
I am happy by myself.
This is who I am. I don’t want to let you down. I wish I didn’t feel like I could.